Every family has had the experience of relatives who are aged and live alone. Invariably, concerns arise, not so much when they are couples that can cope, but more so when one of the parties has passed and the other continues to live by themselve in the same environment.
This situation has been the subject of many conversations among social groupings in recent times, and I imagine that, as we age in life, this reality becomes more evident when thinking of the generation ‘ahead’ of us. We do so because, deep down, one does not relish the idea of being in such a position when we reach that age. Some of us are concerned because we cannot afford to have society think that we are neglecting parents or senior relatives.
Senior citizens living alone are unsafe, period. It is not only that they can become the target of criminals but there is also the reduced capacity for such individuals to care for themselves. The insistence to live by oneself is often a product of what one has become accustomed to over the years coupled with the false belief that you are still able to do what you used to do 30 years ago.
NOT EASY TO ACCEPT
It is not an easy thing to accept change in old age, to relinquish independence, or to give up one’s privacy and social community structure, to go and exist in a more structured environment, whether it be to live with your child’s family or in a home for the elderly. Most seniors who have been confronted with these options resist stubbornly to the point where it is felt that they should be forced but, in doing so, you are likely to hasten their demise.
Recently, I had a cousin, David, a man in his late 80s living by himself in southern St Ann. He had been living alone for the better part of 20 years and was quite healthy, never hospitalised, always having a clean bill of health when checked by his doctor, until an incident occurred. In September 2025, he fell and hit his head; thought nothing of it,. He had to be forced to go and get an examination done by a medical professional. David was a well-respected and revered man in his community, a person from whom many sought and received advice. Although he was a good cook, over the last three years, he had his meals prepared each weekend, for the week by a dedicated ‘caregiver’, which he would warm himself as needed. The community checked on him regularly during the week, he was never really without company.
He sustained injuries to his head in the fall, was taken to hospital, had all the relevant scans done, and was sent home after a short period of observation. Nothing of a serious nature was found or diagnosed, neither then nor in the three or four follow-up visits that were made to the doctor. In December 2025, he was given a clean bill of health. We encouraged him to employ a caregiver to come in on, at the very least, a daily basis. Pride, stubbornness and the life that he was accustomed to ruled out this happening.
Two weeks ago, David apparently fell at home during the early part of the week and was not discovered until the caregiver arrived at the weekend to prepare meals, do laundry and shopping chores, etc. He had fallen and hit his head, once again, and was lying in a pool of blood. Unfortunately for him, no-one had passed by earlier in the week to engage his services or just have a chat.
David died.
OCCURRING
More of these cases are occurring, how does society treat deal them? Children and relatives do have a responsibility to see to the care of the elderly but, once such people still have their faculties about them, they cannot be mandated to vacate their environment. Good sense does not always outweigh the more practical/sensible solution. As much as your friends in your community can check upon you with certain degrees of frequency, there will be times when priorities shift for one reason or another.
Privately operated nursing homes for the aged are extremely expensive from what I have been told, and the environments are not what some people might be accustomed to or are willing to try. Is there room for governments to legislate the caring of our senior citizens more than they have done so far? Should we consider the subsidisation of approved caring facilities, thereby holding them accountable to acceptable standards? These are questions warranting further discussions on the matter of how we, as a nation, care for our elderly. It begs for serious debate, if nothing else but to ensure that we treat with the utmost respect those that contributed to the building of our nation by showing them our everlasting gratitude.
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