Born in London, Toby Stephens, 57, is the son of actors Maggie Smith and Robert Stephens. He trained at Lamda and, in 1992, made his film debut in Orlando. In 2002 he played the Bond villain in Die Another Day. His television work includes One Day, The Split and Black Sails. On stage he has performed for the RSC and the National Theatre, and he is currently starring in Equus at London’s Menier Chocolate Factory, until 4 July, and then Theatre Royal Bath, from 14-25 July. He is married to the actor Anna‑Louise Plowman, with whom he has three children, and lives in London.
What is your greatest fear?
To be completely alone.
What is the trait you most deplore in others?
Vanity.
What was your most embarrassing moment?
I was in a restaurant with my daughter in Los Angeles and I had an accident involving a stomach upset. That was mortifying for both of us.
What is your most treasured possession?
My wife.
What makes you unhappy?
Social media.
What do you most dislike about your appearance?
The width of my body. I look like a fridge.
If you could bring something extinct back to life, what would you choose?
My mother.
Who would play you in the film of your life?
Damian Lewis, because we’re always mistaken for one another.
What is your most unappealing habit?
I can talk over people.
What scares you about getting older?
Everything.
Which book are you ashamed not to have read?
Ulysses – I’ve tried many times and never got through it.
What is the worst thing anyone’s said to you?
A review of Phèdre said – because I was quite large at the time – Toby Stephens’s Hippolytus needs to get on a StairMaster.
What was the last lie you told?
That my wife’s shoes went well with her dress – I just wanted to get out of the house.
What is your guiltiest pleasure?
Cigars.
What do you owe your parents?
My mother particularly was very practical. She was, like, “What kind of plays do you like, what movies do you like? Don’t just sit back and expect this thing to happen; you need to be actively cultivating and curating your own taste.”
What did you dream about last night?
That I was making a very low‑budget movie and I couldn’t fit into my costume.
If you could edit your past, what would you change?
There was a very large part of my 20s where I was an alcoholic, and an addict. When I lost my dad to cirrhosis, I knew that the only difference between us was that, tragically, he couldn’t stop whereas I could.
When did you last cry and why?
I cry all the time. It’s embarrassing. I mostly cry when my children perform something at school. My wife regularly says, “Do you see any other fathers weeping?” But I can’t stop myself.
How often do you have sex?
Not enough.
How would you like to be remembered?
Fondly.
What is the most important lesson life has taught you?
Never ever think that things are going to turn out all right.
